The Daily Parker

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Joke: Lawyer's charity

The local United Way office realized that it had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The volunteer in charge of contributions called the lawyer to persuade him to contribute. "Our research shows that you have a yearly income of more than $600,000, yet you don't give a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the community in some way?"

The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and then replied, "First of all, did your research also show that my mother is dying from a long illness and she has medical bills that are several times her annual income?"

Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbled, "Um...no."

"Secondly, my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?" The stricken United Way rep began to stammer out an apology but was interrupted: "Plus, my sister's husband died in a traffic accident," the lawyer's voice rising in indignation, "leaving her penniless with three children?"

The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, said simply, "I had no idea..."

The lawyer interrupted again, "And I don't give any money to them, so why should I give any to you?!"

Submitted by reader S.S.

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